Three years later. Only a little has happened in my world. Ha!

I have to admit, I was surprised to see that it has been three years since my last post. I was still in my 40's then! Oh boy. These last three years have taught me a lot about myself. I learned that I can be there with an ill or dying parent and do my best to love and honor them, while being supportive to my family and being honest with my feelings. Grieving is tough and we all need to respect one another in how we deal with grief. I miss my mother-in-law and my father dearly, and I will continue to do my best to honor them by living an honest life with my family. I believe they respect my new found courage and are smiling down from heaven and giving me the strength I need to continue to grow.

I am thankful to God for bringing me through a tough patch in my marriage. He guided me through it, and gave me the strength to see that I am enough, and to do the hard work needed to rebuild my marriage anew. I know in my heart that it was no mistake in the timing. It forced me to take a long hard look at my life, and to pursue a new outlook of myself. Brene Brown's books, classes, videos, and the love and support of my family and friends and classmates, Sherri, Marina & Liz, were empowering! I now find myself taking a moment to breathe, just breathe, before speaking. This has been life changing. In doing the exercises and work in Brene's classes, I found that I am a breath holder. Learning some breathing techniques to use in moments of stress, anger, sadness, etc., has truly helped me to feel confident, heard, and seen. Amazing!

When I turned 50, both my kids kind of razzed me about my life. "What do you do all day, Mom"? "Maybe you should think about working again". "Maybe you should write a book"? "Maybe volunteer"? My initial gut reaction was, "I worked pretty much non-stop raising a family for the past 25 years"! And I was really good at it! Didn't I deserve to take a break? I get the whole "once a Mom, always a Mom" thing. My family is forefront in my mind always. I worry about them. I dream for their futures. I still nag, even though I really am trying not to. So, after thinking about what they said, I started to write a cookbook/life relationship book. It's a work in progress, and it definitely took a back burner shortly after I started working on it - due to illness in the family and my want/need to be there for my aging parents, and my work on myself and my marriage. But I'm ready to get going on it again and give it the time and effort it deserves. This blog might begin to be snippets of the book and recipes and stories. Stay tuned.